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humor

To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector…






To find out if she really loved me, I hooked her up to a lie detector. And just as I suspected, my machine was broken.

So,” he called to her back, “Just out of curiosity, you know, purely conversation and all, at what age will you be entertaining offers of marriage?””You think it’ll be so easy?” she called back over her shoulder…






So,” he called to her back, “Just out of curiosity, you know, purely conversation and all, at what age will you be entertaining offers of marriage?””You think it’ll be so easy?” she called back over her shoulder. “No way. There… Continue Reading →

I had fun last night,” I told Patch, flicking off my chin strap and handing over my helmet…






I had fun last night,” I told Patch, flicking off my chin strap and handing over my helmet. “I’m officially in love with your sheets.” “That the only thing you’re in love with?””Nope. Your mattress, too.”Some smile crept into Patch’s… Continue Reading →

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath…






Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

I don’t like it when I outweigh my men…






I don’t like it when I outweigh my men.

How could I be sleeping with this particular man…






How could I be sleeping with this particular man…. Surely only true love could justify my lack of taste.

I love you and it’s getting worse…






I love you and it’s getting worse.

If you have the woman you love, what more do you need? Well, besides an alibi for the time of her husbands murder…






If you have the woman you love, what more do you need? Well, besides an alibi for the time of her husbands murder.

Huh,” Leo said…






Huh,” Leo said. “Well, if you ever get off this island and want a job, let me know. You’re not a total klutz.”She smirked. “A job, eh?” Making things in your forge?””Nah, we could start our own shop,” Leo said,… Continue Reading →

Im stuck babysitting turtle eggs while a volleyball player slash grease monkey slash aquarium volunteer tries to hit on me…






Im stuck babysitting turtle eggs while a volleyball player slash grease monkey slash aquarium volunteer tries to hit on me. Im not hitting on you, he protested.No?Believe me, youd know if I was hitting on you. You wouldnt be able… Continue Reading →

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